The Temple is Closed

We may or may not have gone to bed at 8 PM the night before and we certainly woke up at 5 AM this morning which was great! We got to work on some blog posts, have a leisurely breakfast, make a game plan for the day, and make it out the door for said plan by 8:30. The game plan? Go temple hopping. I really wanted to climb all the steps of the Golden Mount and I thought it was reasonable to meader to a few other temples while we’re in the vicinity so I mapped out a route to take us to 4 temples and a “swing”.

Traveling to Wat Saket

The first part of our journey was a breeze! Hop on the train we’d figured out the day before and go 5 stops. Piece of cake. The next step was to navigate to the ferry site. Again, pretty easy. Google Maps knew where we wanted to go and didn’t lie to us. It helped that this ferry site was very much in the city proper – surrounded by businesses and busy streets rather than tucked down an ally and surrounded by homes.

The ferry itself is where it got a bit tricky. These boats are on a mission! They’re larger boats and better fit what I imagine when I think of a river ferry. That said, they have a schedule to keep so they aren’t stopping for long. They don’t tie off to let people on/off. They use the engines and you risk life and limb to get on/off. Be quick. They’ve places to be! People need to get to work/home/etc.

We asked someone at the dock where to get tickets and were told to pay when we got onboard. Pay how much? Well, that depends on how far you’re going. We needed to go 2 stops and there was a sign that explained the rates but we couldn’t find either our starting nor ending destination on it. It looked like it was about 14 baht for a ride that short so I handed the fare collector 30 baht when he came around and he gave me change. I’m pretty sure I only ended up paying for one of us because Chris did some research and we now think the fare is 16 baht regardless of destination. Oops. I don’t know how to fix this but I’ll happily pay the difference if anyone figures out how.

Wat Saket

First up, Wat Saket aka the Golden Mount. Truth be told, I knew nothing about this temple prior to visiting and I know about the same afterwards. I simply wanted to view the city from up high. It was a lovely area with lots of water features, temples, shrines, and the see/hear/speak no evil trios.

Traveling to The Giant Swing

We left the Wat Saket and headed towards the Giant Swing risking life and limb along the way. We followed the route you saw in the map above. These are actual pictures of the walking areas. We didn’t die! We didn’t even lose a limb or have to offer a blood sacrifice to the travel gods!

The Giant Swing isn’t really a swing and isn’t all that exciting up close. There was however what I believe was a Hindu temple? shrine? in the area and I walked over to get a closer view. The first of many mistakes this morning.

Scam #1

A kind gentleman, walked over and started to explain how the temple/shrine worked, asked where we were from, and where we were off to (the emerald Budha). Mistake. “Oh, I saw on the news last night that it’s closed today for a festival.” You should go see the giant standing Budha instead! There’s this great boat ride you can take to see it and it goes past this thing and that thing and it only costs $1000 baht if you use Thai to ask for the price. Here’s how you say it in Thai. If you say “how much” in English, they’ll charge you $1500 baht per person. It’s only 60 baht to catch a Tuk Tuk over there. Always take the blue ones, they’re managed by the city and never take the green ones, they’re scammy. Oh! There’s a blue one. Let me get you settled. No thanks. I prefer to walk and get some exercise.

My dear reader, I confess I fell for it. I’m trying so hard to practice traveling impulsively and it was exciting to have a kind person give me local advice to see some cool things. But we didn’t have quite enough cash for the adventure so Chris and I sat for a moment in the shade to debate our options. Mistake.

Scam #2

A different man walked by while we were discussing next steps and interrupted by asking Chris how much he paid for his shoes because they looked super comfortable. Okay, in retrospect, this is freaking weird but I didn’t think anything of it at the time. He too struck up a conversation asking us what we were up to and providing advice on things to do instead. He also had a great plan that struck my “travel impulsively” fancy and so we actually got into a Tuk Tuk that he called over. $100 baht to go to his places and then to the ferry to catch the boat that the previous guy had recommended. The driver would wait for us at each stop and take us on to the next destination. He proceeded to write out all the stops and the price etc. It’s the etcetera that got Chris’ spidy senses tingling.

Our new “friend” was adamant that we needed to swing by this silk expo that was happening near one of the stops he recommended. Looking is free he said. And you (pointing to Chris) can always use a new suit. Chris caught on at this point and was insistent that we leave the Tuk Tuk and start walking away. Silly me, I was focused on the but “looking is free” bit. I had read about this scam. I should have known better but I fell for it. Twice.

Scam #3

We continued down the path to get to the Emerald Budha and were walking behind a woman with an umbrella. At this point, we were directly in the hot sun and I was rather jealous of her umbrella to block at least some of the heat. She turns around and asks if it’s this hot where we’re from. We respond, and she says her husband is from England and he too suffers in this heat. She asks us where we’re going. I tell her. Guess what? It’s closed for a Thai people only festival! It won’t open until 3 for tourists. I’ve caught on by this point and I turn around to find another path to my destination.

Kinda Scam/Truth

We finally made it over to the general vicinity of the Emerald Budha which, to our detriment, is right across the street from the Grand Palace. We weren’t particularly interested in going to said palace and so zero research had been done on it. This area has dozens upon dozens of people with signs informing you of the dress code (no shorts, no bare shoulders, etc.) and every person who didn’t meet it, was followed with offers to sell you the solution! If you didn’t notice from the prior photos, Chris was wearing shorts.

Per our tour guide the day before, it’s not a problem for men to wear shorts in the temples. Chris has entered them twice now wearing shorts and no one said anything. This is not the case for women by the way. Women must wear pants or knee-covering dresses/skirts. Cheers to equality /s

Back to my point, we got followed and harassed because obviously, Chris needed to buy a pair of the fancy elephant pants they were selling.

Stick a Fork in Me

It didn’t occur to me until much later that the dress code probably referenced the palace and not the temple. I was just too fed up with the prior experiences and gave up. I had had enough and needed to retreat to a safe space. Ergo, I threw in the towel and we went back to the hotel to regroup and regain sanity. I guess the temple really was closed…

The next few hours were spent poolside with several adult beverages. No regrets!