Don’t panic

My name is Danic-Is how our Osaka food and bike tour guide introduced himself to us.

After recovering from a long day and night at Universal Studios Japan, we had a leisurely morning getting coffee and breakfast at our hotel, and then made our way to the bike/food tour meeting place. The four-hour tour started at 10:30, so we planned to take our luggage with us and store it in a locker at the train station.

I think we’d used up all of our skill points playing Mario Kart last night, so we weren’t firing on all cylinders. At the train station, we were waved past the fare gate where we were supposed to tap our phones. I think the station attendant thought we were attending a special Expo in Osaka, and the train fare was free. Unfortunately, Japan uses a tap-in, tap-out fare method, so when we went to tap out, the red light of doom and an audible failure tone sounded. This station attendant was able to rectify our failure of nonpayment by placing our phone in a tray and deducting the yen from our digital Suica cards.

When we arrived at the coin-operated luggage locker, we put our luggage in the locker, looked at the ¥800 price, and then realized it would only accept ¥100 coins. Ugh, we’ve got a lot of coins that total ¥1600, but only 400 in ¥100 coins. Is there a change machine? Nope. Oh, there’s a konbini, maybe they can make change. Nope, their cash registers won’t let them. Devin and I made individual purchases to break ¥1,000 notes to get the other 400 in ¥100 coins. Are we late now? Nope, our collective fear of being late means that we have time to spare.

The tour starts at a small bike shop on a side street. Danic introduces himself and immediately drops a Back to the Future reference. These are getting rarer as I age and act as an age gate. The other 4 participants on the tour are Zoomers and have looks of confusion as we trade Doc Brown lines. My only hope is to make it in a “Millennials are so cringe” TikTok later.

Generally speaking, bike tours usually go through a standard safety briefing that may typically include things like:

Who here has ridden a bike before?
Here are instructions on how a bike works.
Who wants to bring up the rear?
The cars in <insert country here> drive on the left side of the road.

Ok, the last one was addressed. Danic remarked that if you did die, it would be from the right and to get into the habit of looking to the right.

I think number one was asked, but that was it. We were offered helmets and were told it is against the law not to wear one, but no one does. Devin and I declined. I audibly made the statement that I was happy with my life, and if it was my time to go, I was fine with it. I’m not sure if my words helped the younger participants, but they all took a helmet. I can only assume they weren’t ready to call it quits.

Danic takes us out on the open road, and we quickly get a feel for his style of tour. His attitude is firmly in the camp that it will all work out in the end. Nothing was out of control or dangerous, but there was less oversight than on other tours. Biking in urban Osaka involves transitioning from the pedestrian sidewalk to the road to a back alley, to a narrow shopping street. It can be a lot to navigate if you aren’t prepared. Good news! Everyone in our group is handling it pretty well.

Our first stop was a building called Sembukan. Sembukan was built in 1871 as a reception hall for the Osaka Mint. It is the oldest Western-style building in the city. Danic led us to a Japanese garden adjacent to the building, where we admired the koi.

Back on our bikes, we headed for Osaka Castle and biked our way through tourist central to get a glimpse of the castle. The castle played an important role in the unification of Japan during the 16th century, but there was no food here.

Realizing his captive audience was here for a food tour, Danic took us to a bakery at a train station where we got to pick one sweet treat each. I’ve noticed that a lot of the best restaurants are near public transit hubs. I picked up a cream puff, and Devin got an Almond, Walnut & Caramel Cream Kougin Amann. Both were excellent.

More biking through side streets and main streets, we ended up at a sushi restaurant. Also, right across the road from another train station. It was a conveyor belt sushi restaurant, but the belt no longer carries sushi. It just runs with plates of pictures of sushi. Here we sampled soft tofu with pickled plum, nigiri, and fried lotus root with pork. Everything was excellent, although Devin wasn’t into the pickled plum on the tofu.

Korea Town was our next stop. Since Japan’s occupation of Korea in the 1920s and the forced relocation of Koreans to support Japan during World War II, Osaka has had a large Korea Town. This area has all our favorite Korean dishes. Danic picks up some savory pancakes and fried chicken. We chow down in a small pocket park and enjoy. On the way back to our bikes, Danic announces that he found room in the budget to get some fancy macaroons that caught his eye. Korea Town was definitely the highlight of the tour. All of the stalls, tiny restaurants, and owners pushing their food were a sensory experience.

The bike ride continues through a partially enclosed mall, and Danic stops to pick up some Takoyaki. We also make a pit stop at a grocery store where everyone picks out a drink for themselves. I jumped at the chance to get a sports drink called Pocari Sweat. This used to be one of my hangover remedies.

Our last food stop was at one of the lower parks on the castle grounds, where we indulged in Takoyaki. Takoyaki is a wheat flour ball-shaped snack that contains diced octopus served with a covering of mayonnaise and a reduced Worcestershire sauce.